Early Bird Special!!//Fix My Relationship Friday

Up Next on Be Free 2 Love

tumblr_lyzjhzaz5q1robbgco1_500So, tomorrow begins the Fix My Relationship #FixIt series on my blog. I have the results of the interviews that I’ve conducted on Long Distance Relationships.  I will share this info with all of you tomorrow.  🙂

While you’re waiting patiently for the results, I would love to hear from you too!  What have you learned from your experiences with dating long distance…or didn’t learn?!

Please leave a comment on the Relationships page, respond to this post, or email me at freebryd101@gmail.com, to join in on the fun! Let me know your thoughts are on the following questions, and we’ll discuss this tomorrow.

Here are the questions that I have asked the interviewees:

  1. Have you ever been involved in a long distance relationship? If yes, see the questions below.  If no, answer each question as if you were ever in a long distance relationship.
  2. How did you enter into the long distance relationship? (Did u know up front it would be long distance)?
  3. Were you more apt to cheat because of the distance?
  4. What were the biggest challenge(s) with dating long distance?
  5. How often did you spend time together?
  6. What would your advice be for others considering, or are currently dating long distance?

See ya tomorrow for #FixIt Fridays, to see what the interviewees had to say!!

~FreeBryd

You can check out my blog schedule HERE.

Image #1: http://www.wikihow.com/

Image #2: http://vodkabularies.com/long/long-hug.html

Advertisements

Are you able to forgive?

forgiveness-is-the-best-form-of-love-it-takes-a-strong-person-to-say-sorry-and-an-even-stronger-person-to-forgive-love-quote

A few days ago I was forced into a 5 week long-distance relationship! Ugh! My boyfriend has to do some traveling for work, and I won’t be able to see him in person until mid September. We’ve been together close to 4 years, and this is the longest amount of time that we have been away from one another.

The day he left was pretty overwhelming for me. I sat in bed just reflecting on our relationship. ALL I could think about during those moments were: If I only had 5 more minutes, I shouldn’t have been so mad at him last week, why didn’t I try to reconcile much sooner?

I played around with these questions in my head for quite some time. Needless to say, I was bummed for not taking more advantage of the time that we did have together. Neither of us are saints. So we do have our share of disagreements, screaming matches, and “I’m not talking to you” days. But, I admit that I have the not so favorable trait of holding a grudge.

Since I was in the position of honestly checking myself, I knew that I was the problem. I often ignore many attempts at forgiveness, all to “make a point”. As I sat there silently reflecting, none of those disagreements mattered. My biggest concern was that I’ve let so much valuable time past. Today, I am telling myself that it is perfectly normal to not always agree 100 % of the time with another person. In fact, it’s IMPOSSIBLE to avoid disagreements with others; especially loved ones WITH whom you’ll constantly interact. What does matter, is how you choose to come back together. Like I’ve mentioned, my best move was to ignore the attempts at moving forward, and would miss opportunities to be able to grow individually and as a couple from these experiences.

I want to learn how to forgive sooner than I have been able to do so in the past. For me, a small argument could end up spilling over into the next day…or maybe even the next after that. I’ve allowed my “anger” to keep me from interacting with someone who I care deeply about…and for what? I seriously asked myself: Aren’t you tired of wishing you did something more after the fact? Indeed I was. So, this changes ASAP.

Some thoughts to keep in mind for my current & future self:
1) Get it together, and do it quick!
~Write or reflect on what happened. Ask yourself: What do I need to see happen to
move on? Is this something that I can do personally? Why are you feeling this way?

2) Remember the love you share.
~Write or reflect on your happiness: Why we are together? Remember the countless
moments consisting of laughs and 100 % weirdness. Do the good times trump the
disagreement?

heart-cholesterol

3) Check yourself for unnecessary negative thoughts that are keeping you from being
truly happy.
~Write or reflect on what you are telling yourself to “stay” mad:
What are you telling yourself that is keeping you from being able to forgive? I
sometimes think of the worst possible scenario :-/
Do you want things to get better? Always!
What are you doing to keep this from happening now? Being comfortable with being
upset, and often avoiding communicating.

4) Come back together and stop being so dramatic…as I’ve heard before from others
before!
~Apologize, break the ice (say something silly), talk about it, and move on!

I normally don’t share something so personal, and I’m not one to share such intimate details on social media. But, I wanted to do something to get me to take more accountability on following my own suggestions by documenting this. I’ve also learned recently from a close friend that opening up just a little bit more could actually lead you to help others. I don’t know who this post will reach, but I hope this helps.

~With Love,
From Me.